Very few people know Turtle's story. Turtle was born feral. She was Mama Cats baby. I tamed her enough when she was just about a year old, to be able to bring her and Mama into the house. My cat room was created just for her and Mama. Little did I know that soon more cats would come to call that room their home too.
Turtle was a very unique kitten. She carried alot of the feral personality while inside. She and Mama Cat had an incredible bond. Mama often groomed her and they slept cuddled together quite often. What ever Mama Cat did throughout the day, Turtle would follow suit and mimic Mama. It was always fascinating to watch her behavior, and finally start to develop her own unique personality.
After one year of her and Mama Cat being inside we began to have problems with a neighbor poisoning the cats. Not just the ferals but any pet cats that were aloud to roam. In an attempt to do my part and protect the cats, and also discuss things with the neighbor I decided to bring Ashley and Delilah inside too. It took two years to befriend Ashley, and Delilah was pretty easy after the first year. So, inside they came. I handled things wrong, and was quite ready to give up on all the ferals, just to keep peace in the neighborhood. It was a struggle, and adjustments had to be made, but we made them.
The four cats inside developed upper respiratory infections. Turtle never recovered. She spent 4 days at the vets on IV's and antibiotics, but in the end her little body couldn't fight the infection any longer, and we lost her.
I have lost a lot of pets during my lifetime, but losing Turtle was a heart wrenching loss for me.
I felt guilty, as if it were my fault. In my mind I felt if I hadn't tried to save Ashley and Delilah, I would not have lost Turtle. I cried for weeks. Mama mourned the loss of her baby. I couldn't go into the cat room without breaking down in tears, and would have to rush out of there. I felt I let Mama down. I was suppose to protect her baby, and I failed. I failed Turtle, and I failed Mama.
I vowed to never bring another cat inside. I wasn't going to do feral cat rescue anymore. I closed my heart off and wasn't going to care. Just feed the ones outside, and that was it. No more. I couldn't get close anymore. The guilt ate at my soul, and I was determined to never let that happen again.
Then came Oscar. My angel boy. The special orange tom cat that was always beat up. He had different plans for me. (his story in a few days).
So why I am telling Turtle's story. Well, in a way, this isn't really about Turtle, but another unique special little kitten. To be continued.......